Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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