why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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