My sheets look like a crime scene.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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