Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Randomize
