I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
