They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
