my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
