youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
