The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
