Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
