I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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