Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
