'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
