My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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