I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize