I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
