I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
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