Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
