I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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