OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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