she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
i think im in europe. pls send help
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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