i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize