Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Randomize
