The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
She needs sedatives and a leash
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
