tell your sister to shave her snatch
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize