i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
No subtext here. People are naked.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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