im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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