If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
