Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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