So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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