Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
