Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
