He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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