It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
