You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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