Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
