how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
