it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize