Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
