We won't sleep together?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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