garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize