dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
