Its about making memories worth repressing
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
