Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
