No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize