I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
