Its about making memories worth repressing
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
