he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
