He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
