you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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