I'm going to jail i love you
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
