So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
